Funny Lookin'
by Ruinedbloodshed
Summary: TF:A, A walk in the woods turns into something else, something much more fun. WARNING! Prowl/Jazz slash within!


Jazz and Prowl strolled through the forest side by side in the evening sunlight. Jazz made a few halfhearted attempts to hold the other's hand but was cleverly denied by perfectly timed arm movements to go along with the story being told. When said story was over Prowl clasped his hands behind his back and they both walked in silence for a while. Jazz had tried his best not to laugh, he really had. That instance was a darker memory for his lover and it was something that he was sensitive about. Jazz had really… REALLY tried his best.

"What is so funny?" Prowl snapped.

Jazz was holding his sides trying to look like he was just crossing his arms. Clearly it wasn't working.

"It's just… ol' Screamer really took you for a ride didn't he?!"

That finally seemed to break Jazz's control. The sports car really started to laugh in earnest and had to put a hand on the nearest tree to keep from falling onto his face. Not that he would have cared at that point. The black and gold mech beside him hardened his face and walked by him in a huff. Suddenly their relaxed stroll through the woods became strained.

"Pa… Prowl!" Jazz said between giggles. "… dun get mad…"

"I'm not mad." Prowl said flatly, clearly mad.

"Come on," Jazz said pushing himself off the tree and catching up with Prowl. "You have to see the funny side of this."

"I don't find anything about that funny."

"You don't even think your," Jazz made air quotations with his fingers. "fake static… was the least bit funny?"

"No."

"I did." Jazz smiled. "I didn't have ya pegged a rule breaker. That was pretty cute of you Prowly."

"Prowl." the dark ninja corrected quickly. "Not Prowly… Prowl. And I am not cute."

"But I like Prowly, Prowly-bot."

"Jazz…" Prowl warned. "Can we talk about something else?"

Jazz took Prowl's elbow and lead him off into a little clearing in the forest of trees surrounding them for a little more privacy. It was a nice, a little cramped for two full grown mechs, but good enough. Jazz took a seat on the organic grass and crooked a finger for Prowl to do the same. The cycleformer shook his head and remained standing, he was still annoyed with the sports car. Jazz gave his lover a pout but Prowl seemed immune to its usual disarming power.

"But I want to hear more about you taking on the Starscream clones yourself."

"I don't want to talk about that anymore. It's a sore issue for me."

"Hmmm really?" Jazz said, holding back a little purr in his voice.

"Yes. Very… really. My ineptitude caused harm to my teammates and cost three organic animals their lives."

Prowl twisted his cute little lips into a pout that Jazz was pretty sure he had meant to be a frown. Too bad for Prowl that the elite ninja thought every expression of his was cute no matter what. Jazz laid back on the grass with his hands behind his head. Once he was comfortable the elite ninja reached up and pulled the smaller cycleformer on top of him. Prowl collapsed into him with a strangled gasp and found himself lying chest to chest with Jazz. Black and white paint mixed like yin and yang.

"Prowly-bot, slag happens. Sometimes you can't do anything about it."

"I know but if I had just…"

Jazz put a white finger to Prowl's thin lips before he could launch into another self loathing tirade. The dark ninja was stunned enough by the intimate gesture to fall silent.

"Prowly, sometimes things happen. And you can't do anything about it, all you can do it put it behind you." Jazz repeated.

"I… I know."

"Good, now… keep talking to me," Jazz said drawing Prowl closer. "Why don't you tell me about those mods you somehow got you hands on hmm?"

Prowl groaned and pulled away from Jazz and sat up in the sports car's lap. The blue visor brightened as Jazz's smirk turned into a full blown smile as he propped himself up on one elbow.

"Oh yeah, I heard about those. I noticed that you left them out of this version of your story."

"I'd rather I forgot about them." Prowl said not only ashamed but now embarrassed to boot.

"Come on," Jazz teased playfully. "Everybot has tried mods at some point. What where yours like?"

"Im… impressive." Prowl managed. "B-but very wrong! I'll never touch them again!"

"I'm not your CMO Prowler." The white ninja chuckled in amusement. "What kind of upgrades did you get out of em?"

"I…"

"What? Afraid they'll come back to haunt you?"

"Not at all… it's just…"

"Aww… it's alright Prowler." Jazz said rubbing Prowl's arm affectionately. "You don't have to tell me if ya don't want to."

"Thank you."

"Can you at least tell me what ya looked like in em? They didn't clash with that pretty paint job of yours did they? Because that would be a crime."

"No, they just happened to be almost my exact coloring."

"Well that was awful convenient don't ya think?"

"Yes it was." Prowl nodded in agreement.

"So," Jazz said with a smile. "Did you get a sweet new helmet?"

"I did in fact."

"What it look like?"

"It was... bigger and bulkier. It also had more armor down my face. Right along here."

Prowl traced a tan finger down his cheek to show where the extra armor had been. Jazz's engine hummed a little louder but it went unnoticed.

"And it came with a bigger chevron."

"…Yea…?" was all Jazz could manage at the moment.

"Yes. About three or four times bigger than mine."

Jazz really didn't know how Prowl couldn't hear his engine revving up, or maybe it sounded louder to him with the sound of his energon pump right in his audio. Not that Jazz was complaining, but he hadn't expected to get all excited over Prowl's mods like this. How did Prowl have the amazing ability to be sexy without even noticing it?

"Aww…" Jazz reached up and stroked the gold adornment. "I like your chevron like this."

Prowl stared down at Jazz with a most perplexed look on his face. Jazz tried to give a lopsided, harmless grin, but by the way Prowl's visor took on a more cobalt hue Jazz guessed that his grin might not have sent the "innocent" message he had intended.

"Really now?" Prowl asked flatly.

Jazz couldn't tell anything from the tone of Prowl's voice and he was having trouble hearing it over his own pulsing pump and now the cooling fans that had clicked on. When Prowl's question finally did reach his daydreaming processor Jazz couldn't resist the immediate response.

"Sure do. Makes ya look sleek."

Jazz continued stroking the muted gold chevron from tip to base and then up to the tip on the other side.

"Makes ya look very professional, and I do love a mech in uniform."

"The mods made me look dangerous." Prowl said offhandedly. "The new chevron looked like what humans call "devil horns," I hardly looked… sleek… as you put it."

"You're already dangerous." Jazz purred in a husky voice. "You don't need mods for that."

"Hardly." Prowl scoffed.

The elite ninja suppressed a shutter, he knew Prowl could be dense when it came to romance, but he couldn't be THAT dense to not notice what he was doing could he? He decided Prowl might need a much less subtle hint. White fingers reached past their current infatuation with the cheveron to dangle higher in the air. Prowl looked up at the fingers hanging above him and the moment he did they descended upon him. Tenderly finger tips caressed the upturned face, taking in every feature. The dark ninja looked back down as Jazz's fingers fondled the lines he had drawn with his own fingers.

"Jazz…what are you doing?"

"Imagining what you would have looked like." His words and fingers paused for a moment. "I bet you where pretty funny looking… I like funny."

"I'm sure I was." Prowl said brusquely.

How in the universe did he miss that one?! Jazz wanted to gape at the thick firewall around his processor. Did he have to just grope him and pull out his interface cable to get his message through to him? He thought they were on the same page with for crying out loud!

"The new shoulder armor must have made me look comical as well."

"Shoulder armor?" the other ninja asked confused.

Jazz lamented where the conversation had gone in the space of two sentences.

"Yes, it was quite cumbersome, and it threw me off balance. It was big too. They went all the way out to here."

Jazz watched, becoming even more confused, as Prowl took his hand and drew it over his shoulder almost what Jazz would consider seductively out to where the armor must have reached to.

"That… looks like it would be…" He started.

"But the jump jets boosters…"

Prowl dragged Jazz's hand over his shoulder lightly and up his left jump jet. Once there Prowl interlaced their fingers much to Jazz's bewilderment and the elite ninja's cooling fans hiccupped and then increased their speed. Did Prowl have any idea of what he was doing to him?!

"They attached right here…" Prowl delicately trailed Jazz's fingers in an arc where the mods had been connected to him. "They looked like big black rectangles sticking off my shoulders… very funny looking."

"Y… yeah…" Jazz stammered.

Jazz's engine gunned embarrassingly loudly as the dark ninja lead forward so they where face to face. Jazz felt Prowl lead his hand down the jump jet onto his neck then over and down his chest to the red Autobot insignia. The elite guard's shaky fingers stroked the symbol almost immediately. Jazz wondered how could Prowl be so brainless to NOT notice his reaction this time.

"Do you think I looked funny now?" Prowl whispered.

The thin lips so close to his own sent ghostly sensations across his entire neural network and Jazz couldn't say anything. It seemed his vocalizer had somehow got a short in the last few seconds. The black and white ninja had to question whether Prowl was still innocently talking about his mods or if he was implying something else because he really couldn't tell anymore. He was finally able to shake his head from side to side in a "no" gesture after a moment of distracted thought. Prowl smiled a wickedly charming grin.

"Good."

Next thing he knew Jazz found himself being kissed rather forcefully. Forgetting that his elbow was the only thing keeping him propped up Jazz reached up with both hands and fell onto his back with Prowl on top of him. Pale fingers hungrily sought out seems in the black plating as the sports car engine revved happily. An answering rumble from Prowl sent thrilling vibrations through the elite ninja. After a few blissful moments of sensation everything suddenly seemed to snap into place. Jazz broke away from the kiss to see Prowl leering down at him. He didn't even think the cycleformer was capable of such a conniving look.

"You deceitful little trickster!" Jazz said in a tone that was anything but angry.

"Ninja-bot." Prowl grinned, like that explained everything.

"You knew what you were doing to me the whole time!"

"YOU laughed at ME…" Prowl purred as his tan fingers wormed their way into both of Jazz's ticklish wheel wells.

The black and white squirmed under him and gasped as Prowl excited the sensors hidden behind Jazz's front tires.

"Consider it payback."


End file.
